I've been struggling what to write next, when Holy Spirit gives u a purpose it is much easier to write under his supervision. I was so worried that I might forgot that day that I scrubbed it down on piece of paper. Well on Thursday 24th July has been an interesting 'day off', originally excited about visiting place called Hartford. Knowledgable place of museums such as Mark Twain's house, science museum which I never got to see any (time ran out).
When I got there, the place was seemly rough, out of place. Saw first police car chase which was unusual. Town was eerily quiet, not as busy, Hartford is capital city of Connecticut. I thought to myself, it's fine, we gonna see some great stuff. I'm gonna meet some deaf people at bowling later on that night, go with the flow or so I thought. Where's taxi?! It isn't like NYC, the only cabs I saw was at the station outside parking lots.
Gold plate windows in Hartford.
Hair dressers guy chatting, found out he's italian.
The outcomes
As I learnt that when things don't planned out well, re wanting to see Mark Twain museum but it was too far with no cabs in sight, when things don't go your ways, you learnt so much from it and how to do better next time. But this makes me think instead of that what ifs just really appreciate for all the things have work. The smallest things really make the big picture. Like I'm so thanksful I have 'feel at home' data roaming so I can FaceTime my friends and family anywhere and anytime without causing extra worrying aboard. GPS to get to places I need for example haircut, working out distance to museums and places and that made me really appreciate the small things in life.
Appreciating all small things
With the Facebook social media going on about 3 things that you are grateful for, it's great! It had been nagging on my mind for the last few weeks, perhaps God wanted me to appreciate the small things, small changes I am making and not worry the big picture. Sometimes, when small things happens, it turns out to be the big picture. This is something God telling me to lean onto him and trust him.
3 things to be grateful on that day off
I'm so grateful for strangers talking to me today for example, man working on track at the train station helping me out the journey after driver dropped me off at wrong desination point. A guy at mini walmart chatting where my 'accent' came from, when I question about costing (forgot they added tax here!) Other thing is chatting to my parents via mobile and friends back home via FaceTime. Thanks goodness for 3 network, feel at home data roaming.
My friends willness to take time out to chat and see what's happening out there in USA.
On that day, it's hard to explain but I guess I was awaiting for something big to happen, what I meant by that was wanted to meet up with deaf people in that area, see Mark Twain exhibition which I was disappointed I couldn't get to see. You learn yourself through that, rather than dwelling what if, it makes you grateful for all the things you have, this and made me think but God never leave you and today He made me appreciate small things and not look at bigger picture.
It may not be an interesting theory to you but when small things matter, it really matters the most. When things doesn't go to plans, trust The Lord with all your mind, heart, strength and soul even when you can't even see the outcome out of this. So after thinking about that all day, fast approaching evening to catch my train at 8pm, the day was going seemly okay I felt this urge to chat to this girl on platform (this isn't something I do FYI).
Girl on the platform
I have no idea why I'm here in that place, maybe it was the very last thing on that day that God wanted me to pray, talk to that girl who was so opened and willing to share to me about her father, it was last time she saw him when she was 5. I also learnt that God can do the unexpected when you least expect it.
After friendly chats as I found out why she was at Hartford, she finished her science exams this morning and heading back to New Haven, on same train as me (she is studying medicine and doing extra studying like study camp over the holidays as she love studying) so we was having general conversation, chilling, chatting about general life, culture differences between us, achievements etc. I also mentioned that Im Christian, involved helping out in church and studied Thelogy at Bible College hence reason why I moved to Ireland from England. She's in her 20, goes to Yale University and explaining the long process, stages in order to getting qualified, which she won't grad after medical school in her early 30s. (FYI medical friends, med school here are costing $300,000 for the whole thing). It's no surprise that is long hard road up ahead in doctor's field as I know few friends are still ongoing and as well graduated. Then we moved on the subject on 'siblings' she have 1 brother, whom she get on superbly well with, her mother is Italian, she worked over Florence in Italy last summer as part of her medical placement. Her father separated when she was 5 but haven't seen him since, it was a messy divorce, control by alcohol additions and still is to that very day. Wow, she really had opened it up. She explains she doesn't drink even when she turns 21 in next couple months (drinking law is 21 in USA oppose to 18 in UK) because of that, which was understandable but is this normal conversation you get with people you only just met?! I don't know, but surely Gods works was there enough for her to open up her past. I said, I would pray for her father for God to work in him and that merely is the addition is controlling him but praying God to work in him. She said she prayed for him sometimes but even if he was healed from alcohol addition it would be a weird as she haven't seen him whilst growing up, which it is a sad story. She, however on positive note, was proud to say she is first in her family to attend College (University) and especially not any university but she is in one of the top ten University in the world. She's lovely girl and sounded like she was very well brought up in NYC by her mother alone.
These things are small things I appreciate, the time out to chat. The last one was a blessing (encouraging for me to chat a stranger). It has really change my day quickly and that God uses me to reach out to her. I'm so thankful for that.
A good hour we have been chatting to the stranger (I won't mention her name), I'm sure the girl and myself will remembered this conversation for a long time, and over that. I'll be praying for her for Jesus' love flowinly over her and may she get to know Him personally in the future or seeing Gods work in the doctoring field, healing, miracle. God's plan, his plan, seeds planted, out of my control. In his will, his kingdom come. I'll pray for her father to overcome the alcohol addition and her studying towards doctoring for next 10 years.
The missed train and the unexpected
So I'm writing this blog, as train got delayed missing my other train so having to wait another hour on New Haven platform, I finally arrived at my station at 11pm at night. Having waiting for 'pick up' from my work, camp for at least 40 mins, I eventually gave up waiting and told them I'll hail cab instead. I had this strange urge to run to the camp rather than getting a lift (stupid I know, in pitch dark, in a strange countryside not knowing area well). And not only that, it's also 7.9 miles long (further I ran was only 6 miles) thought to myself yeah, I have enough time to get in before curfew at 00:30. There wasn't any taxi ranks at the station anyway so it was a good enough reason for me to run. I looked at my mobile to bring up GPS, but realised I was low on juice...10% remaining battery power left (probably I shouldn't have written the above blog but I couldn't contains my excitement). GPS is on, I started running, avoiding the highways, racing against time, I took the longer way round on the street, surburbs in pitch dark, praying for God to stray this battery life a little bit longer. I believe that he would look after me. I got to roughly a mile and half, I was sweating loads in my Adidas wife beater top, it was humid at this time of the night. I came across and saw 4 police cars outside Walmart car park where I regularly shopped with other staff at camp. Thought myself this is great, at least I know this area. Time was getting on and I realised only had 4% left, wow it's going faster than I thought. I thought myself, need to be wise here, best if I picture the map in my head, seeing there's 5 miles straight on the bendy road, working out that if I run for at least 5 miles on straight and narrow then double check so I can preserve the battery life little longer till I become really unstuck. I quickly turn off my mobile and as I continue running, then reaching to another crisscross road, I was sure I wasn't meant to be running towards there as I didn't recognise the name but I continued running for another half a mile but I had this funny feeling while running so I switched battery on, and to my horror, 'battery needs to be charge' noooooo! This is when I quickly ask God send the Holy Spirit down to lead me on the right path. I felt straight away my head was tingerly, it was powerful, I felt sense of peace, overflow joy as I felt HS was laying on my shoulder, it's hard to explain but feels like hairs standing on back but it was on my head for as least a good 10 mins, thinking to myself, oh wow it's gonna be such a story to tell on here, thinking that HS will direct me home. I was feeling HS was trying direct me back to road where I was thought I made wrong turn but I continue to ignore it thinking it can't be, in a few minutes I ran towards dead end, it was pitch dark, approaching 12. How wrong was I, so I though, best to gently jog back to Walmart which was half mile away, where police cars were and could sweetly talk to the police officers to call for taxi instead. When I arrived, police cars was gone, searching around most of the shops were shut but saw bright luminous Dunking Doughnut opposite, opening 24/7, so I popped in and asked if they could called the taxi for me, the guy was happy and willing. After trying to get through on the phone, he explains they weren't picking up the phone and there is no taxi around at this time of the night meaning I had no other way of contacting others as they were in bed, curfew was fast closing in at 00:30. Surely, they would have noticed I'm not back? The guy got off the phone and said he couldn't get through, but finishing his shift soon and will ask his dad to dropped me back camp soon. I was so blessed than stranger would do that. I really was chuffed to bit. Sat down, brought drink, started charging my phone and for good 15 mins we began chatting, I somehow felt I could talk to him anything. He is 32, struggling to hold down a job hence working at Dunkin, he actually from Hartford where I just went today so we had something in common. The job situation was something I could understand, I asked him quite bluntly, do you believe there's a God? He quickly says he is an atheist, doesn't believe in God. I said I understand your point of view as I went on explaining that world we live in, we are all blind to see him because of this, as the verse below explains.
Roman 3:23: For we all sinned, we all fall short of his glory.
Then he was explaining about his mum is devoted Christian goes to church every day, from the past, she has bad upbringing, rough background and got involved all sort of stuff, she was lost but found God but he dislike the idea of attending church regularly as it feels like it's a chore. I explain to him that being with fellowship, friends is amazing. The love, connecting, community, building up one and another. God can work in that, unless he experiences His love, he will fully understand Him. His mum would known the differences gaining peace through hard times, joy and happiness which she cannot get from this world. She found that special thing, no more searching, she found that special gift and for that he can have it instantly. With regarding to church, let put it that way if he for example wanted to become an elite swimmer, he need to trained with team mates to help him to achieve to that professional standards rather alone, that's what it's like at church with fellowships. I explained that you don't have to have be bad to find God, then I explained my testimony, I realised how much telling your testimony is a powerful tool to use, I told him that my life was good before I met Jesus and didn't need Jesus in my life but then I realised now that having Him have made it thousands if not millions times better. I can't explain His radical love for me, it has to be experienced for you to understand. I suggested to him he should read Christian book and let him decide himself whether God is real or not, the one I recommended him If God, then what? By Andrew Wilson. He was so interested by the story that I spoken. He quickly got piece of paper and pen from counter, and start writing it down. I'm sure Holy Spirit was moving him, words was flowing out of my mouth.
I also recommended him to go Alpha course, this is questions about life for anyone who doesn't believe in God. That's moment when his father arrived so our conversation got interrupted. Later on, he did however asks for my number in the car afterward as I wasn't expected that but glad he asked. We, short while later also got pulled over by police. I managed to get picture below for you. I finally arrived at camp at half 1 in the morning and no one even noticed that I was missing. Hopefully I'll be popping by up with the guy, Patrick soon as we regularly go to Walmart, so will pop in for Iced coffee. I would like to buy him a book as a thank you gift (they, both refuses money for the lift). I really pray for Patrick, that God to move in his life, direct him to the right way. Just wow, God being there with me, directing me along the path to him. How wonderful that Patrick thought of that idea to offer a stranger a lift, I shall cherish his kindness to me and he will be blessed by my heavenly father.
Matthew: 10:42 And if anyone gives even a cup of cold water to one of these little ones who is my disciple, truly I tell you, that person will certainly not lose their reward.
Although the plan didn't go to plan, did I regret it?! No, I looked too hard at the bigger picture and totally missed out seeing the smaller things that happen today. I was entirely grateful that them and myself was there at that time. I will probably never see them again but today has really challenges me my thinking and appreciate the smallest things in life. God is funny, he knows me too well. I have talked and share the gospels with people who never been connected with Jesus. You gotta stay bold and expects the unexpected.
I work really hard at trying to see the big picture and not getting stuck in ego. I believe we're all put this planet for a purpose, and we all have different purpose... When you connect with that love and that compassion, that's when everything unfolds.
Ellen DeGeneres
Please answer below for good recommendation book to read for people seeking about God, answer on the comments below!
